“Someone is reading my MIND right now?”

Yes, they are Olive. They are hearing all your unspoken and unheard thoughts. And apparently, you are quite the chatterbox. Olive and I encountered the Hackettstown version of the Long Island Medium today. As we wait in line at the feed supply store where Olive and I stop at the end of our walk to get “candy” for Olive (Translation: Bully Sticks and Biscuits), the woman in front of me wheels around on her heels looks at Olive and then very emphatically says to me: “She really, really loves you and wants you to know that you take awesome care of her.” She follows that with, “I’m a psychic, I communicate with both people and animals.” And then something to the effect of, “I can’t help it, she (points to Olive) keeps talking. She wants you to know that her collar is too tight.” And I’ll be damned, but I reach down and it is a little too tight. And you can’t really tell that by looking at it, and she said it so quickly, it seemed genuine. I look at Olive and instantly I feel like Sherman to her Mr. Peabody. The Psychic natters on like a magpie and I keep staring at Olive. I feel confused, unable to hear her thoughts and thinking that I should see the words tumbling out of her mental cauliflower. The Psychic wants to give Olive a big biscuit, but I decline and make the fatal mistake of offering TMI (too much information) by saying that Olive has a fragile digestive system. The Psychic takes out a crystal hanging from the end of a silver chain or some sort of amulet and begins swinging it gently like a pendulum over Olive’s head. By now, even I’m transfixed. “She needs food without wheat in it. That will be better for her tummy.” Kim, the woman behind the counter has a strange look on her face. Like she’s embarrassed for me because I’m being subjected to this public “reading” of my dog. I didn’t mind. How could I? It made my day to hear that Olive loves me and thinks I take such good care of her. The Psychic pulls out her business card and hands it to me. Olive and I exit the store and climb in the car. “I love you too Olive and I want you to know that you take very good care of me.”