Patti Soldavini

Liquid Clouds

In dogs, humor, pets, weimaraners, writing on 07/07/2011 at 3:36 pm

"This MUST be its head."

Olive, a pro at looking as innocent as an infant fawn when she most needs to, thoroughly enjoyed the Fourth of July celebration at my cousin’s house. With her characteristic grace and wit, she stretched her Audrey Hepburn-like neck across the picnic table and extended her bright pink tongue as far as it could possibly reach to lick the icing off the cupcakes, nose through the macaroni salad, and nip at the hot dogs. Clearly the dog prefers dessert as more than once she had to be forcibly extricated from either the Friendly’s Orange Crème ice cream and sherbet roll, the black and white homemade cupcakes with edible 3D red and blue “firework” bolts standing atop each or the dutch chocolate ice cream log. She never got much before I’d hear someone shriek, “OLIVE, NO!” And then someone would have to scrape the icing off the cupcakes because I ask you, who wants to eat dog nose prints? Olive’s ears recoil as she starts to back away from the scene of the delicious crime. Smacking her lips, I can see the glint of delight lighting her eyes. ‘YEAH, THAT WAS DEFINITELY WORTH IT,” thinks a gleeful Olive. “FOR GOD’S SAKE OLIVE, DO WE STICK OUR NOSE AND TONGUES INTO YOUR FOOD BOWL?” Olive looks up at me as though she has no idea what I’m talking about. And then she abruptly takes off. You’d think she just recalled where she left her garter belt on Saturday night. Instead, she decides that this seems like an opportune time to chase Hunter, the 120 pound Golden Retriever and Oliver the tiny Tibetan Terrorist around the small yard. The three dogs begin chasing each other, racing in circles so swiftly that it appears that the circle is unbroken and that each of the dogs is a charm on a sterling silver bracelet. Green grass flies in all directions as they momentarily lose traction circling a bewildered bush, sometimes slipping but rebounding so quickly that the fall is almost imperceptible. Oliver is chasing Hunter who is chasing Olive, who lives to be chased. They are moving so speedily that I fear the centrifugal force will jettison them one by one into outer space. And just as quickly as it started, it stops. Olive now turns her attention to the oscillating fan, approaching it inquisitively. She plants her face directly in the fan’s wind pattern and she stands there letting it cool her off. What a goofy dog. After all the less ambulatory guests leave, we bring out the “spray mister” which looks like a garden hose that has been fashioned out of tough green plastic piping and stands up like a cobra snake ready to spit. (Perhaps this was not an accident in the design.) We connect the garden hose to it and it starts spraying a seductive fine mist in three different directions. Olive runs over to the spray mister like she’s late to prom. She’s not quite sure how to approach it, as it envelops her in its petite moist clouds. First, she tries biting the clouds to great comical effect. Because she’s biting very daintily and not snapping her mouth closed each time, it looks like she’s trying to gum the clouds to death. Not satisfied with her intake, she decides to take the proverbial bull by the horns and chew on the tiny golden spouts releasing the moisture. I don’t think she realizes that as she is imbibing the “liquid clouds” that her entire head and face is slowly getting soaked. The irony is not lost on me. I should have used this as an opportunity to bathe my little monochromatic monkey.

  1. Olive sounds as if she is usually the life of the party! Miss Stella loves her little fan and Sadie Lou adores the hose. Neither care much for fruits or sweets though. : )

  2. Olive you are such a hoot. No one living with or around you could ever be bored, you are most entertaining. Loved the picture of you with the mister. Sounds like you had a real banquet to enjoy, too bad they wouldn’t let you have all you wanted. If there were such a contest we would nominate you for entertainer of the year. 🙂 Seriously, you would be sure to win. Hugs and nose kisses

  3. I laughed aloud as I read this post! Ellie has the same affinity for sweets. Her mother ate 2 entire sweet potato pies the day before she delivered the litter, so I like to think that’s where she developed her sweet tooth! She does not, however, care one thing about the garden hose or any other apparatus which sprays or squirts water!! I applaud Olive for her fearlessness! It always amuses me that my silly girl with her webbed toes (just made for swimming!!) completely abhors water in almost any shape, form, or fashion. She won’t even drink water from a bowl . . . unless that bowl happens to be the bathroom sink. 🙂

    • I am thankful that Olive is pretty fearless especially since she was bitten by another dog when she was about 7 months old. I worked very hard to socialize her when she was between 12-16 weeks old. Olive LOVES sweet potatoes/yams! You’re lucky it’s the sink; Olive thinks the toilet bowl is her water dish. I gave up and keep the lid down now.

      I do not. (Olive)
      Yes you do. (Patti)
      I do not. (Olive)
      You always have to get the last word, don’t you? (Patti)
      Ja. (Olive)

      • Oh no! Poor Olive!! I understand completely – when I took Ellie for her 12 week shots, I looked down to find my baby huddled in between my feet with a pug attached to each of her sweet ears. She never made a sound although she looked very distressed. No harm was done, thankfully – her ears were just covered in a nice layer of slimy saliva! Ellie’s very nonaggressive with other dogs & is socialized pretty well, too. Seems her apprehension is only in relation to inanimate objects. 🙂 Go figure. Ells also loves tomatoes, strawberries, and oranges. Give sweet Olive kisses from Ellie! They’d get along famously!

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